Reliving Old Grief

 

I dreamed of my mother again,
And of my grandmother.

I was back in my old childhood house, living out of a suitcase,
And having to face my mother’s death again.

My uncle was also there with me;
I sensed that he had been sent there to help me recover from my mother’s death, and was praying for me.

I kept wandering around the house looking for something familiar,
Something of comfort, but could find nothing.

I kept a blanket around me (I was only in my undergarments
Underneath,) and thought to get dressed, but even the clothes in my suitcase
Were unfamiliar.

I seen the odd collections of ceramics and plates that were still unfinished, (she liked to make them,) but they were things I had not seen before.

I sensed it was time to give them away.

I kept crying, the grief overwhelming me
Consuming from the inside out.

I tried to go through the closet to the other side of the house
Like I used to when I was young, but it had long been blocked off.

“I miss you so much mother!” I exclaimed to the closet wall.
“And I miss you too, grandma & grandpa!”

“But I miss my mama most of all!”

No matter how hard I tried,
I just kept crying.

I then woke up.

*

When I awoke,
I kept hearing the tune of a song, (a top 40 song,) that keeps repeating itself:
“I keep bleeding…Keep keep bleeding…love…I get cut up inside…”

I looked up the date of when my mother died.

Several years ago this Thursday.

Figures.
Maybe that’s why I dreamed of her again.

“That,” I felt God reply,
“and the tulips that are sitting on top of your kitchen counter,
Constantly reminding you of your grandmother.
They help too.”

I thought of my mother and how she lived in the same house as her parents,
And wondered how she coped with all the memories of her parents
Constantly surrounding her.

My heart remained heavy though,
As I relived the grief from my mother’s death.

“This is an attack from satan, Ma Petite,” my God replied.

“A dream of my mother?” I was a little confused of this.
“What’s wrong with having a dream of my mom?”

“This dream, brought you grief, pain, and loneliness, all over again.
Which kingdom is better served, bringing you that?”

True; it was hard to continue on with life when you’re struck down again with that ‘death grief’. Yes, reliving old grief definitely was an attack from satan….

*

Matthew 6:34 KJV “Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”

Psalm 23:1-6 (KJV) “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.”

John 14:27 (KJV) “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

 

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The Spirit of Christmas

I was shopping in a store that was going out of business. I found many good deals of things we had been needing for a long time so my bags were full. As I was leaving the store, I seen an older man off to one side, about thirty feet from me. He looked like a shady stranger that one would try to avoid at all costs to be safe.

When he seen me, his eyes lit up and he said “Wow, I see you bought someone lucky so many presents for Christmas this year! They are going to be filled with the spirit!” It was hard to hear him, for he was mumbling and far away from me. But I understood the gist of it.

As soon as he finished speaking, I seen three shadowy demons come out of him and try to tag themselves onto me.

“Oh no!” I responded under my breath, “these things are not for Christmas! There will be none of that in my house!”

And as soon as I stopped speaking, I seen the demons pause, and then heard them whine and complain and tell me that I was no fun, before they turned and raced back into the man who had spoken to me.

My son came with me into the next store, and as we walked in I almost stumbled. The sudden weight was so oppressive that it was hard for me to walk. I had to bind it up in the name of Jesus to continue. We could hear the Christmas music blaring overhead and it reminded me of a nasty swarm of stinging insects. The place was very busy and overcrowded, and everywhere I looked I could see the colors of red and green.

We picked up the item we had come for and went to stand in line.

People were in a foul mood, angry at having to wait for so long in line to make their holiday purchases. Many were second guessing their purchases while they waited, verbally wondering out loud if so and so would like it or not.

As we left, my son told me that he had been hit with the demon of ‘I have to buy something’ really hard, but he refused to give into it and so he bought nothing.

We realized that was where the pressure was coming from; all the demons of ‘I want’, ‘me me me’, ‘whine’, ‘complain’, ‘less money’, ‘more debt’, ‘I have to buy’, ‘doubt’, ‘mine’, ‘more’, ‘should’, ‘spend’, ‘pressure’, ‘expectations’, and ‘failure’. The store was literally overflowing with demons!

We also realized that all these demons were under the authority of a principality demon called the spirit of Christmas.

We went to a food truck to bring back dinner, and there I met a man while waiting in line who was telling me of some job opportunities. He had been unemployed for a few weeks and had been praying that he would find a good job.

So I said to him, “May the Lord bless you and give you the job of your dreams!”

He starred at me for a second and then said “Oh! You’re a Christian!” Then he paused for a moment before asking me “Do you go to a church around here?”

“No,” I told him. “We have yet to find one that sticks to the bible.”

He then went on and on about the church he goes to and how magnificent his pastor was. He went on and on so much about the man, that I couldn’t help but wonder if the man was closer to his pastor than he was to Jesus.

I grew tired of hearing about the perfect pastor, so I interrupted him and asked “Do they celebrate Christmas there?”

I will never forget the look on his face; It blatantly said “well, duh! Of course!,” but to the man’s credit, he then blinked and said “yes.”

“Oh,” I said. “Never mind then.”

He frowned. “You don’t celebrate Christmas?”

I could see the thought that a believer in Jesus Christ that does not celebrate the holly day was a new encounter for him. So I told him, “We researched into it and found that it had too many pagan ties to it. We also found that there were so many demons attached to it that we stopped celebrating it.”

“Oh,” he said, and said nothing more.

I looked at him and realized that this was a man who had no idea of the war that raged all around him. As he said his goodbye and we exchanged blessings with each other, I inwardly cringed. It was like watching an innocent walk back into the slaughter, wondering when he would get hit.

When we got back home, we immediately noticed that things felt lighter. I asked my husband about it, and he too, said he noticed that there was less pressure in the house. He then sheepishly told me that he had finally gotten around to bringing that nativity scene to the dump, and that this is why the atmosphere was so much lighter in the house.

*

Please don’t just continue to blindly follow the world in celebrating this pagan holiday, and then wonder why you are having problems. The Lord is very clear in His word that we are to have nothing to do with mixing pagan practices with His worship. When we do, problems arise. There are only two instances when a person’s birthday was celebrated in the bible, and both of those times were by pagan kings. But if you really want to celebrate His birthday, celebrate it during the feast of Tabernacles, when we celebrate that the Lord has come to live with us. If giving up Christmas is just too hard for you to do, consider celebrating Hanukkah with its seven candled menorah. There one has several days where one shares the miracles that the Lord has done in their lives and their families lives with one another.

May the Lord bring you into His perfect peace,
C. Dunamis

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(Note: For scriptures on this, see the post on how satanists celebrate Christmas.)
https://dreamsofdunamis.wordpress.com/2013/12/25/cast-out-the-spirits-of-christmas/
https://dreamsofdunamis.wordpress.com/2014/12/15/how-witches-and-satanists-celebrate-christmas/
https://dreamsofdunamis.wordpress.com/2016/12/12/a-short-video-clip-about-christmas/

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Playing Football For The King

A dream…

I am to work for the King. But the work I was doing was being stopped by the authorities. I knew I could go over their heads and get the job done, but I’d have to fight all their red-tape and that thought scared me away.

So I left, but not far enough away. I went to the ocean side, and hid among many others.

Then I heard that the King was searching for me. A part of me was flattered, (the King wants me?), and yet the other part of me, wanted to be left alone.

Then I overheard people saying that the King was searching for someone who could play football for His team.

I knew, without doubt, He was searching for me.

An emissary for the King called out to us all, “The King is looking for the one who can play football!”
Others around me, gave pause for a moment, and then continued on with their life. I could have raised my hand, but did not. (Why? Too shy? Or did I just not like playing football, and would rather not?)
So the King’s men spread out among the people, and began to play football among them. Every now and then, the ball would chance upon someone, who either ignored it, or tried to play it back to them.
Then, as I was interacting with others, the ball came right at me.

I caught it without thought. I held the ball for a moment, and then nonchalantly tossed it back to them.

“Hey!”, they exclaimed, pointing at me, “she can play football!” (A girl who can play football? – A novelty!)

“Get her!” exclaimed their leader, and they all began converging to where I was.

I ran. They followed. But they couldn’t catch me. Every time they’d get close, I’d manage to get help from the others around me and they would hide me.

I enjoyed the chase, for it was a chase between a loved one and the lover, but I did not want to be caught! Getting caught would mean the loss of my freedom, and I enjoyed living free.

Then, they caught me. They marked me as one who belonged to the King, and then brought me before Him.
I feared seeing Him. I knew He would want me, but I feared settling down with Him. Wouldn’t everyday life with the King be boring? There would be responsibilities placed upon my shoulders, responsibilities I did not want. I knew joining with Him would be wonderful, but I just didn’t want to join him yet!

Then, suddenly, I am before Him. The great King comes down from his throne, and comes to me. Already, my soul feels the pleasure that will come from being with Him.

He dismisses his men with a nod, but never takes His eyes off of me.

(Oh, to be loved like this!)

He reaches out to me then, aglow with His power and His love, to gently touch my cheek. “Why, ma petite?” He asks me.

At first, I cannot look at Him, and then I can no longer avoid Him, and I then open my eyes – my soul – to His gaze. With just that one look, He can see all my emotion; my fear, my projections, my self-will. And a moment pauses, as He takes this in.

Then, He asks me again, “why? Are you not mine?” The mixing pain, shame, and love, is too much for me to take, and I close my eyes.

Then I awake.

* * * *
Jeremiah 7:10, KJV
“I the LORD search the heart, I try the reins, even to give every man according to his ways, and according to the fruit of his doings.”

Deuteronomy 13:4, KJV “Ye shall walk after the LORD your God, and fear him, and keep his commandments, and obey his voice, and ye shall serve him, and cleave unto him.”

1 Samuel 12:24, KJV “Only fear the LORD, and serve him in truth with all your heart: for consider how great [things] he hath done for you.”

Jeremiah 29:11-13, KJV “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find [me], when ye shall search for me with all your heart.”

Revelation 22:4, “they will see His face, and His name will be on their foreheads.”

Luke 10:2, KJV “Therefore said he unto them, The harvest truly [is] great, but the labourers [are] few: pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he would send forth labourers into his harvest.”

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