Being Freed From The Demon Of Depression

Today, I wish to post a testimony of thanks to my Heavenly Father, on this Father’s Day. I praise The great I AM! I praise You Jesus! I Thank You very much for saving me!

Many years ago, I had been suffering from clinical depression, probably brought on through the ill-advised use of the anti-depressant Prozac, prescribed for me (in dangerously large amounts,) in the hope that it would heal me of the constant migraines that I had been suffering from. Instead, it led me into a nightmare that almost ended my life.

Few people can really understand the anguish that affects one suffering from this kind of depression, unless they themselves have also suffered from it. For me, it was an actual physical pain, that affected my whole body. It physically hurt to be alive. So I have included a poem that I had written during this time, which shows the depths of which Jesus pulled me out of.

Within The Hungry Emptiness

The darkness ascends
It covers the mind
As thick as tar
To a place no one finds.
All the tiny pieces
That once could form your life
Now scattered in the air
You try to grab for one
To put it back in place
But your hand stays empty.
A ghost
In a solid world
Half here
Half there
Anywhere
Yet nowhere.
You float
From thought to thought
And jump
From deed to deed
So many energies in the air
Never finishing
Or going anywhere.
Red from anger
Gray with futility
Hands clenching through
A snarled empty head
Unable to grasp a thread
Watching the pot
Boil over with fear
Stumbling
Disjointed
Beyond just broken
Death’s stone face within me
Pulls my feet across the floor
Performs the motions of the living
While pulling my mind through its door
And shutting itself behind me
Click.
No fear
Too beyond it now
No hope
Too far ahead
So lost
So I stay where I am
Within the hungry emptiness.

*

Below is an adapted version of a ‘reader’s theatre’ script that I had written (and performed) for a church I used to go to many years back. It is the testimony of how Jesus used one of His obedient children, to stop me from committing suicide, during the lowest point of my life. 
 
(From my viewpoint:)
I hid myself… in my bedroom closet.
Shut the doors…, then closed my eyes. Depression!…
That… ever-hungry emptiness… that haunted me,
Had finally… consumed… my all.   
All I could think of… was… how to kill myself.
But… through these thoughts,
a voice… from within… called to me, 
and whispered,… “I need you.”
I questioned the voice,… then realized it was God.
I told him how unworthy I was,… how useless.
Yet… he persisted.
“But… you’re God!”, I said,
“You?…You can do anything!
I scoffed. “What do you need me for?”
He answered,…“To help others… like you,
  To reach out …to those… among you
who have gone through… what you have.”
When I asked Him how,
He told me …time would tell,
And to somehow …just get through the afternoon.
“But I can’t!” I cried,
for I feared… my enemies,
Pain,… emptiness,… and… despair.
They’d press me to death, while I waited there. 
Then the voice reminded me; “Genna”.
“But God,” I said, “she’s probably busy today.”
Yet… I found myself calling her anyways.
I asked her if I could come over to visit,
And she told me… she wasn’t sure. 
“I’ll call you right back though,” she said,
“and let you know.” 
So I sat there by the phone…and waited. 

 (From my friend Genna’s viewpoint:)
I slammed down the phone,
Angry at God,
To think he would even ask this of me!
“You know,” I said, speaking out loud,
“just how long I’ve planned to go to this party,
And now you’re demanding I cast it aside?” 
“Be with her,” the thought clearly filled my mind,
“But Lord,” I insisted, “I can be with her tomorrow.”
“No,” the spirit whispered firmer this time,
“I need you to be with her now.”
I sighed, defeated, and said, “oh, all right,”
And when she arrived after my call,
I did sense something wasn’t right. 
We talked about the weather, the traffic, and gardening,
Spoke about nothing at all.  
Then after a time she stood up and said she felt better, 
And told me she needed to go;
For her husband would be home soon. 
“Oh how could you Lord!,” I fumed to myself,
as I followed her out towards the door, 
“I don’t understand why you asked this of me;
This was all such a waste of time!”
But after we said our goodbye’s to each other, 
She turned back to me and added,
“Thank you Genna, for being with me today.  
I would have committed suicide,
If it hadn’t been for you.”
I stood there stunned, as I watched her walk away,
Angry, my mind raced, and I wondered,
What should have I done instead?
“Peace little one,” the Holy Spirit replied,
“you have done what I asked,
now you must let her go.”

*

It took a while to be completely freed from that demon of depression. (I did not know at that time, about casting out demons in the name of Jesus.) Fighting off the depression always seemed to be a struggle. Till one day, listening to a prophesy TV show, the speaker, while praying for those in the audience, suddenly stopped and looked up into the camera, and said that there was someone listening to the broadcast, that was being freed from the demon of depression, right at that moment, and that this person should claim their healing in the name of Jesus, and to forbid satan to trouble them anymore. Satan tried to tell me that the message was for someone else, but I still wondered if it really was meant for me. “Yes! You!” the man’s voice called out (it felt like he was speaking directly to me,) “Do not doubt your healing! You have been set free!” At that moment, as I stood there in the living room doing some housework, I felt the heavy weight that had been on me for so long being lifted off of me. I decided right them and there, that I would claim the message as my own.

It worked!
Glory to Jesus Christ of Nazareth; for indeed, He has set me free!

(And yes, in case you were wondering, Jesus also healed me from the constant migraine attacks, but that story will have to wait for another day… 🙂

*  *  *  *

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15 comments on “Being Freed From The Demon Of Depression

  1. Praise the Lord! That is a very powerful testimony.

    I suffered from depression for a number of years beginning at the age of 15. It was a combination of the sins of my fathers and my own sin–I stopped praying to God when I was 11 years old and I became more rebellious until I became an atheist at the age of 15. I was suicidal from 15 till I was 25. Even though I asked Christ into my life when I was 22, I still suffered from depression.

    I had spent time in 4 mental hospitals and I knew that the medication wasn’t doing any good; I knew it was a spiritual problem. The Lord healed me of manic-depression (demonic bondage) at the age of 25 and it felt like I was born again all over again–it felt great to be alive. BUT that is when my dad started to really persecute me and mock me, so I knew that I had to leave home. The mocking by my dad was so bad that I had these hot, searing pains in my hands, feet, side and a circle of pain around my head for three days. On Easter Sunday 1986, after three days, the pain was gone.

    Depression (demonic bondage) can be very debilitating. Since I am half Irish, I know that the depression came from my idolatrous Irish side of the family. There are many mental hospitals in Ireland–probably for alcohol abuse and depression. I really believe that depression comes from the sin of idolatry. Ireland is very Roman Catholic. If you put your trust in the Roman Catholic Church for your salvation, this is idolatry.

    Jesus came to set the captives free. “The anointing breaks the yoke of sin.”

    • Hi Tim,

      Thanks for sharing what happened to you; The Holy Spirit must have been strong in you from the beginning, for you to have such physical signs of your conversion around your father.

      Interesting what you wrote about Catholicism and idolatry. I am not Irish, but I was brought up VERY Roman Catholic, and before the above incident, I had fluctuated between Catholicism, Atheism, and witchcraft, all in an effort to deal with my problems, especially my physically abusive father. A part of me wonders if this too, formed some kind of doorway for satan to attack me with the demons of depression and suicide. After all, feeling the lack of a father’s love can greatly affect a child’s life!

  2. That is so awesome! And it shows why obedience to the holy Spirit is so important. My cousin’s husband suffers from the same thing. I was there last week and witnessed it myself, so sad. I told my cousin she needs to fast and pray for him and lay hold of his healing because he is an unbeliever. I pray she does so.
    Thanks for sharing! In Christ, Sarah

    • I used to believe that depression was simply ‘anger turned inwards’. Most therapists and twelve-step support groups teach this. Yet then this would mean that all forms of depression would be gone, as soon as the anger would be turned back outwards. For our family, this has not been the case.

      For us, the spirit of CONDEMNATION, has been a prelude to the attack from the demons of depression. Much more so than anger.

      In our family, Anger, and its root of bitterness and unforgiveness, has been more instrumental in opening the doors to the demons of cancer, than it has been for the demons of depression. Both of my parents and my grandparents held onto deep wells of bitterness, anger, and unforgiveness within their hearts for most of their lives. And each of them ended up with a cancer that ate away at their insides. There was one grandparent that did not, and no cancer was found within her when she died. Neither my parents nor my grandparents ever suffered from depression.

      Both anger and condemnation however, (as well as depression and cancer,) are demonic spirits sent by satan to steal our joy, kill our faith, and destroy our lives.

      I have seen, and some of my children have seen, the actual demons that have attacked our family with anger, despair, depression, and suicide. When one can see them physically attacking the person, all the explanations of man fly right out the window!

      In my experience, demons usually need some form of weakness or doorway, to be able to enter into our lives and attack us. In my case, I had a physically abusive father, who kept telling me over and over again, how worthless and stupid I was, and that I would never amount to anything. This, by itself, did not open the door to the spirit of depression. It was when I began to dabble in witchcraft, as a way to get vengeance upon my father for his abuse, that really opened that doorway. (My own sin opened it.) Then the demons were able to use my father’s words against me, repeating them to me in my mind, over and over again, in the hopes that I would internalize them and make them mine.

      The “Blood on the doorposts” book by William & Sharon Schnoebelen (Chick publications,) is an excellent book on spiritual warfare, that helps with these kinds of problems, as well as others. I’ve purchased my copies at this link: http://www.cuttingedge.org/detail.cfm?ID=177 I highly suggest it for all believers fighting off the attacks of satan.

      “Prayers That Rout Demons” by John Eckhardt (available from Amazon,) is also a good book to use to help cast out satan and his legions. They are quick biblical claims that can be used like a sword, to fight off the evil one, especially when right in the heat of the battle!

      The demonbuster web site has some excellent information on how to remove the influence of demons from our lives. http://www.demonbuster.com/ They have short links on both suicide and depression. They have many more detailed links on the casting out of demons. Definitely worth checking out!

      Shalom and God bless,
      C. Dunamis

  3. This comment comes from “Bread”:

    I’d thought the same thing when I saw the commercial before..a demon hounding this lady and following her around…even after she takes the pills it’s still around

    yeah the side effects are potentially very bad..death. With some of the new commercials they now just say death quite a lot.

    ..I’d always thought that one doesn’t die of death..or cause of death is never listed as death, when someone dies people ask why they died, the answer isn’t they died of death, yet the commercials just say death a lot now as if the industry has become so empowered within the system of rule and law and they don’t need to explain or warn why anymore.

    It’s not like because of the warnings of all the harmful side effects that the numbers of peoples on various prescriptions is declining, it’s actually rising..now some 50%+ of all american’s on pharma drugs…through hearing the warning always they become conditioned to not think much about it anymore? And the drive for gains causes mass over prescribing…they do call it an industry don’t they.

  4. They do indeed! It is listed in Fortune Magazine, as the top industry for revenue. (Here is the link where I read this. About one third the way down the page, you will see the statistics: http://www.yahuahreigns.com/witchcraft.html) Sometimes I wonder if it has all become another false God for the people to worship. This believer makes for an interesting case, that these drugs might even be a sign of the end times, as far as ‘pharmakeia’ is concerned:
    http://legaldruginteractions.com/category/medication/drugs-and-sorcery-connection/

    Kind of scary, when one sees the whole world following after it…

  5. Depression is a demon, it is a voice hoping to kill you. My new book has depressions voice and it is apparent it is a demon trying to destroy me. Patient it sits in wait for opportunities to end me. Well written. If you ever want to write with me email 🙂

  6. Im suffering from depression bad with all these voice’s in my head always telling something’s not right about where I am and how his lieing to me all the time and how his still in love with his ex it’s killing me cause I want this wonderful to be happy and live for god and as for my boyfriend he reads the Bible and he wants to walk with God he always tells me this but tge voices I hear in my head tells me he will never really love me he keeps me around to keep the house up and nothing I’ll ever do will be right and everything he tells me is lies.. I feel like when he looks at me it makes him sick and he wishes I was her.. he keeps telling me my demon is telling me lies but I don’t no if it’s truth I’m so lost I know what I want in life I no the life I want but I feel so useless.. I feel like if I just ended my life I would hurt no more.. I really use to believe God put this man in my life for a reason cause being with him changed me so much and he says the something.. feels like tge devil knows how bad i want this life and how bad i want to live for god that his trying to pull me back down..

    • Dear Brittany,

      When those voices try to tell you these things, tell them that they are liars, and that you do not believe them, and then cast them out in the name of Jesus! In my experience, the suicide demon was in me, yet he had lots of friends that he worked with outside of me, to try and bring me to a place where he could destroy me. It is imperative that you rebuke these demons every single time they try to convince you of their lies. SATAN ALWAYS LIES! He always tries to make things out so much worse than they really are! I have found him out in his lies so many times now, that I just automatically rebuke whatever he tries to tell me. How can one know who that voice is from? 1 John 4:1-4 says: “4 Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world. 2 Hereby know ye the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesseth that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is of God: 3 And every spirit that confesseth not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is not of God: and this is that spirit of antichrist, whereof ye have heard that it should come; and even now already is it in the world. 4 Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.” I have found that satan and his legions are not able to say that Jesus Christ has come into the flesh. When I ask those voices that have attacked me, to say it after me, they can not. They will try and pause, as if they are about to say it, but they still can not bring themselves to say it! This has been very liberating for me. I pray it helps you as well!

      As a side note, if you are living with your boyfriend unmarried, and yet are having sexual relations, then you need to repent of that and stop doing it. Sin can open up doorways for the demonic to attack, and as believers, we do not want to find ourselves outside the will of our God!

      If your boyfriend has had sexual relations with this other woman outside of marriage, then an unhealthy soul tie was created, and needs to be broken. See: Soul Ties – How To Break Free!: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/glyndalomax/2014/05/23/soul-ties–how-to-break-free.

      Please see also: Suicide: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/glyndalomax/2014/03/07/suicide

      May the Lord Jesus Christ bless you, the child He loves VERY MUCH, greatly!

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