Thinking Of Leaving Your Spouse?

I Had a dream the other night.

This was a dream, where me and my husband separated shortly after we were married.

I went to New York City, met another high fashion artist, (he could have been an actual sculptor or painter artist, I’m not sure.) We got married and stayed together for a few years, and then we separated. During this time, I became an unbeliever. After the trial separation period, we divorced.

I then went from long-term relationship to long-term relationship, each one lasting a few months to a few years. In some of the instances, I married them, and then divorced them.

I was great at matchmaking all my friends, (I had good enough friends to call them my ‘sisters’,) but wasn’t so great at it when it came to myself.

In my latest relationship, we had taken a break from each other, (Which is how my marriage to my first husband ended, by the way,) and I was in a nice upscale apartment in New York city, a high rise of some kind, close to the financial district. I was unpacking, and wondering why I always ended up by myself, and dancing around in my apartment, singing to a song called “Bad Case Of Loving You” by George Palmer, from 1979.

A hot summer night, fell like a net
I’ve gotta find my baby yet
I need you to soothe my head
Turn my blue heart to red

Doctor, doctor give me the news
I’ve got a bad case of loving you
No pill’s gonna cure my ill
I’ve got a bad case of loving you

A pretty face don’t make no pretty heart
I learned that buddy, from the start
You think I’m cute, a little bit shy
Momma, I ain’t that kind of guy

Doctor, doctor give me the news
I’ve got a bad case of loving you
No pill’s gonna cure my ill
I’ve got a bad case of loving you

Woo oohh

I know you like it, you like it on top
Tell me momma are you gonna stop

You had me down, 21 to zip
Smile of Judas on your lip
Shake my fist, knock on wood
I’ve got it bad and I’ve got it good

Doctor, doctor give me the news
I’ve got a bad case of loving you
No pill’s gonna cure my ill
I’ve got a bad case of loving you

(In the dream, when the song said ” I know you like it, you like it on top”, this was not meant to be sexual, but was instead a comment of how the person always liked to be in control and on top of things in a relationship.)

I could see my reflection in the mirror, and knew that I looked good. I was slim and trim, and still had no gray hair. (Though I could have colored it.)

I was wondering how long it would be, before meeting someone new, (I was still ever full of hope of meeting the ‘right’ guy,) when I caught the eye, of another man from across the apartment complex; another high rise apartment owner, looking for love as I was. I smiled back at him and knew then it would not be long.

Years later, out with one of my ‘sisters’, we were talking and trying to find out why no relationship of mine ever lasts very long.

The last one I had before my current one, lasted eight months. The one I was, again, taking a break from, was a little over seven months long.

While we were out, we seen both of these men. At this point, I was just as familiar to the older one as I was to the newer one. I kissed the older one, and he asked me if I realized how long it had been since I had kissed him and hugged him. I said no. “Eight months”, he replied. I grabbed his arm and asked him to go to dinner with me and my friend. He went, cause that was the kind of guy he was; somewhat shy, with a true heart. (Like my first husband.) My friend then seen my current boyfriend, (well, at least the most recent one,) and pulled him aside and managed to cajole him into joining us. He didn’t really want to, for he was trying to ‘take a break from me,’ like we had agreed to do.

We all sat down in the restaurant, and began to talk about the problem of my relationships going nowhere. The guy who I had been with in the past, was solid and dependable, but was too staid and unexciting for me. (He was thinking of getting everyone to sign a petition in his neighborhood, to try and fix the water quality. That was as exciting as he got.) My friend, my ‘sister’ said she’d take my cast-off any day, and proceeded to hook up with him. They ended up getting married and living happily ever after.

I soon realized through this talk, that I still had a deep seated fear of loved ones leaving me, and the moment I would feel like something was not quite right, (at the first sign of a problem,) I would go ahead and leave them, just as my first husband had left me all those years ago. I would leave them before they could leave me, and before I could get any closer to them. It was just as I used to do when I was little, when I’d suddenly find out that we were moving again. I’d break it off with all my friends as soon as I heard, for I didn’t want to get any closer to them and thereby get hurt even more.

Deep down inside, I knew that I was still in love with my first husband. Like the song said, ‘I had a bad case of loving you’. But I knew that he would never take me back.

My current boyfriend and I, decided to get married and stay married. But the marriage seemed like it was always missing something. We had no children. It was in no way shape or form like my marriage to my first husband. It lacked depth. It lacked that soul bonding closeness.

It lacked God.

I woke up then, my heart pounding, realizing, that if my husband had left me, back in New York, like he almost did, I would have never really known God. Jesus would have become just a legend or a fairy tale to me, without any real substance to hold on to in times of trouble.

I also knew, without doubt, I would have ended up in hell.

After I got up, I could still hear George Palmer’s song running through my head. I quickly put on some praise and worship music, and begin praising my God at the top of my lungs, and thanking Him for keeping me and my husband together…

THANK YOU JESUS CHIRST OF NAZARETH!

(And thank you my wonderful husband, for staying married to me and being faithful to me all these years!)

*

I know these pieces of scripture can be painful, yet they are still there in the New Testament, and not something we should simply cast aside to pander to our feelings of discomfort. There are some real truths in these. I sense that they may be describing a simple unchangeable fact, and not just giving a basic ‘do not do this’ command…

Mark 10:2-12 (KJV)
And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you? And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter. And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery. (See also Matthew 19:3-12.)

Matthew 5:31-32 (KJV)
It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. (See also Luke 16:18.)

1 Corinthians 7:39
“A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.”

Romans 7:2-3 (KJV)
For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.

1 Corinthians 7:1-2, 6-16 (KJV)
Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?

Hebrews 13:4
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

1 Corinthians 6:18 (KJV)
Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

Merriam-Webster defines fornication as: ‘consensual sexual intercourse between two persons not married to each other’.
*

I can understand why Jesus would say this. Divorce is painful. There is a strong bond that is made, with the first person you marry, that is not so easily broken. And fornication brings in some nasty demons. These demons are shared with each other within the marital bond. (The two have become one.) By allowing divorce from someone who can not remain faithful to their marriage, Jesus was protecting them from repeated severe demonic infestations.

Please know, I do not say these things lightly. It took a lot of persuasion from the Lord to even post this article. I know how uncomfortable it makes people. If not themselves, then everyone seems to know someone else who has gone through a divorce and then gotten remarried again.

I do know how difficult it can be, to live with an abusive spouse. I grew up watching my father physically abuse my mother. (She did not know about casting out demons.) Yet please note; even physical abuse is not given as a permissible reason to divorce your spouse. Jesus DID however, teach us to cast out any demons troubling us in His name. (If not cast out, at least bind up.) In my experience, violent demons are ALWAYS the cause of spousal abuse, and they can be removed. So, get yourself to a safe place, and then get rid of the demons but keep your spouse!

For a piece of insight on how satan can work between two people, see: https://dreamsofdunamis.wordpress.com/2012/02/10/this-is-satan-attacking-us/

The Holy Spirit has told me, that there is someone out there reading this, who is thinking of leaving (or will be thinking of leaving,) their spouse. I pray that you do not. I pray that you find a way to cast out any demons that have come between you and your spouse, and to stay close to the Holy Spirit’s leading. Shalom; He WILL bring you peace!

Find Him Next To Me

Another dream…

In this dream,
I was a young, beautiful woman.
I knew I was beautiful, for everyone kept telling me so.
I was one of those rare ones, who had only needed the addition of braces at age twelve, to become quite beautiful.
No other addition to my body was needed.
I had full, slightly wavy dark hair, down to my waist,
And was often told that I looked like Kim Kardashian.

I was in a big house, with a big party going on, with many beautiful people in attendance that I knew.

These were the ones that everyone else wanted to be,
The Hollywood types with lots of money and style.

People had come to this party, looking for their pleasures.

I was looking for my boyfriend.

I was looking forward to being with him again, for I had been away from him for three long days on business,
And missed his touch and companionship.
I was living with him,
In the hopes that he was ‘The One’
That would be faithful to me.

But as I searched for him through out all the bedrooms of this mansion, I discovered him in one, in bed with another man.

I Cried out to him,
“You just couldn’t wait a weekend for me to return, could you? What happened? I know it isn’t because I didn’t pleasure you enough!”

The guy tried to defend himself to me,
Denying to me that he was even having relations with the man, but that was of no use, for I had caught them in the act itself.

So I went out into main room, thoroughly disgusted with what I had just seen.

Others were there, again seeking their pleasures, with drugs of all kinds. And a few others that were there were still working.

But I realized that we were all there in this house,
Taking shelter from some kind of outside destruction that was expected to reign down upon the people.

One woman was there taking care of her ward,(doing her job) and was still going by her strictly scripted curriculum, in what to do next for her student. She had gone into the fridge and made some kind of food, (as it had fit into the curriculum,) but they had not eaten it all and had told no one else about it, and instead they had left it out to spoil. I found it, and berated them for it. (Couldn’t they have shared it with the others? What a waste!)

Just then a good friend of mine came into the room, and she asked me why I was not with my boyfriend. I told her we had just broken up. I told her that this did not mean that I was going to give up in my search for the right one. Indeed, I was still even more determined to find him.

Her eyes alighted, and she told me she had not given up either. She reached out to me and then tried to lay down in my lap. Then I suddenly realized that she was talking about me! She desired me as her mate! I told her that I was only interested in males, not females, and she then pleaded with me, to at least let her TRY to pleasure me. “You could close your eyes and pretend if you wanted,” she exclaimed to me.

I sensed from deep within me, that this was not right. Why should we have to settle for less? I asked her why she now desires women and not men, (for she had before professed to desire only men,) and she points out into the room, and exclaims, “just look at them! They mistreat women terribly! They can’t even be loyal to one for even a few hours! But women, they are able to remain loyal to another for a longer period of time. you, I know that you would be loyal. I have watched you for a long, long time. I know you. You would not leave me.” I looked down into her pleading eyes and told her no, and that she too should wait for the one who will love her as she needed to be loved, and that she should not give up looking for him.

Just then, I heard a bomb go off in the distance, with people outside screaming.

No one inside the house responded to it. No one cared. They were intent on living as if there was no tomorrow. With grief, I knew then that they might just keep on doing what they were doing until they died.

Then I heard a song in the background, called “Next To Me,” by Emeli Sande. It made my heart ache terribly, for this song was describing the kind of guy that I so deeply desired. One who didn’t seek out the parties, drugs, money or fame. One who would be faithful to me, no matter what.

As I listened to the lyrics, I suddenly remembered, hearing from somewhere, that there was one, whom a group of people believed in, that would love you and never leave you.

The Christians, the believers. They believed in Jesus.

Many of them had found what they were looking for in Him.

As the song finished playing in the background,
I realized that this was what I was going to try next. Perhaps there really was something to those who believed in their God Jesus. Perhaps this Jesus could help me find a mate who would be faithful to me. Perhaps then, this loneliness from deep within me, would be assuaged.

As I left the party, I tried to tell those who would listen, that they didn’t have to settle for second best, and that they could have the true love they were looking for.

But they were too involved in seeking their pleasures, and in continuing on with their daily assignments, to take any notice. Even the girl who had proclaimed to secretly love me, was shaking her head no, and looking at me as if I had finally lost it.

So I left the party, in search of this Christian God named Jesus.

I then woke up to the song slowly,
As I heard that voice inside say in time to the final refrain:

“So if you want a mate like this one that is faithful,
And who’ll be there for you in these darker days,
Just know that you won’t find him where the rest go
You will find him
You’ll find him next to Me…”

*
To hear the song and view the lyrics, go to:

Or to watch the solo music video, go to:

*

I am here today to personally testify
That I was once like this woman, looking for one who would be faithful to me in thick or thin. I had some beauty, I had some money, and I even had some fame. But I was still empty inside, no matter what I did. And I was married to a man who was held bound to his liquor, his career, and his pride.

But a neighbor seen how empty I was inside,
And she told me about the Jesus she knew,
(this one sounded so different from the distant Roman Catholic one I had been brought up to serve,)
And so I soon decided to reach out to Him,
To see if He could help me
To find that true love that I was searching for.

I found it in Him,
In a way that I can still barely describe today.
I not only found that elusive true love with a man that is described in love stories, I also found in Jesus a true best friend who deeply loves me and is always with me,
And who guides me into blessings and good things.
When I placed my whole life in His hands,
When I made my whole purpose in living to simply know Him more and more,
When I spoke to Him as if He was right there beside me,
THEN,
Is when He gave me my heart’s desire;
To love a man who loved me no matter what.
For me it was not instantaneous,
But happened slowly over time.
My true love was the same body
That had been pledged to me years ago.
But now he was different. His family came before work. He no longer drank or scorned me. He had changed. He had accepted me for who I was, faults and all.
He had become that ‘new creation’ that the scriptures tell us of. He shows me true love beyond my wildest dreams.
I see Jesus in him daily, and marvel at his love for me and our children. He loves me almost like Jesus does, with faithfulness, longsuffering, patience, kindness, goodness, self-control, and gentleness.
Now we grow old together, and as our physical beauty fades,
We focus on each other’s beauty from within.

NEVER EVER have I ever regretted,
Giving my life up to Christ!
(Or remaining married to my wonderful husband!)

I am testifying;
You don’t always have to leave the one you’re with;
To find your true love.
I believe it is possible for The Lord Jesus Christ of Nazareth
to change the one you love,
And make him (or her) this ‘new creation in Christ’.
So if you believe that your loved one has been called by God, then persevere and keep that faith.
It may take much P.U.S.H. prayers (Praying Until Something Happens,) and casting out of demons, but happen it will.

You only must believe.

* * * *

“Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4, NIV

“Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.”
1 Corinthians 6:9-10 ESV

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?” Hebrews 13:4-6 ESV

“To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.”
1 Corinthians 7:10-11 ESV

And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. For the promise is for you and for your children and for all who are far off, everyone whom the Lord our God calls to himself.” Acts 2:38-39 ESV

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23 (KJV)

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV

* * * *

Keep Going, Till The Last One Is Saved!

I have been praying and asking the Lord,
To give me more dreams of the future,
Ones where His children,
and those who would one day become His, would be saved.
Dreams where they would be provided for,
despite great hunger and famine.

Then two nights ago, He gave me one.

*

This time, I am with a young black man.

(No one ever pays any attention to me,
so I sense that I am a spirit simply sent there, to observe.)

This young black man, his name is Willie.
No one really knows where he came from,
Or how old he really is,
He just always looks the same some how.

He is average looking,
With a welcoming face.

His clothes are old and well wrinkled,
Torn in places, but he hides that the best he can.

He lives out on the streets,
Among the homeless of the land.
And among the homeless, he is known to have the least.

He usually lives by one of the shopping malls that is still somewhat full of merchants.
I watch him, as he weaves in and out of the people and the stuff for sale out on the sidewalks,
avoiding the patrolling cop car with long practiced ease.

Finally, he turns into a store, that was selling clothing,
(they were having a big sale there that weekend,)
And he quickly picks out a man’s shirt,
(it reminded me of some kind of seersucker material,
but it was an all beige color,)
and then went to the locked cabinet up front, to see about finding a nice men’s necklace.

The one’s there for sale, were made of a composite metal, with a brushing of pure copper over it.
(Gold and silver jewelry had not been sold in the area for some time.
All anyone in the area could afford, was the cheep shiny copper colored jewelry sent to America from overseas.)

He was looking for one that was the richest looking,
And he stood there for several moments, trying to pick one out.
They were made of multiple metal chains, and the chains all came together in the middle,
anchored to each side with a good-sized eagle, its beak holding together the bunch of chains.

The shop clerk then came over to him, and opened up the case, and pulled out one near the one he had been looking at.
He was about to tell her that she had the wrong one, when he realized that the price of this one was actually cheaper,
yet the item looked the most expensive. So he nodded to her that that was the one he wanted.
The price was twenty dollars, on sale. So she handed it over to him, and then walked off.

Willie then stood in line, waiting to pay for his purchases,
but as he got nearer to the counter, he suddenly realized that he had nothing with him to pay for it with.

I knew that the shame of being in line and waiting to purchase something with no money burdened his heart.

So when he got to the counter, he asked the clerk there if he could please somehow place it on hold until tomorrow,
and pick it up then. (The shop was now closing for the day.)
This was unheard of; the shop keepers would not hold anything for anyone anymore,
but the clerk just gave a big sigh, and said ‘O.k. Willie, I’ll trash it for you.”
Then she wadded it up into a little ball, and stuffed it up under the counter into a corner,
and then motioned for the next person to be helped.

Willie then left the store,
Promising himself and the store clerk that he would return on the morrow with the cash,
(I sensed he figured he would get this out in the country, maybe perhaps from his old home,)
and began in earnest to search among the buildings,
Gathering up with him, all those who were willing and ready to now get onto the bus with him.

Willie longingly looked up at the corner of the entrance, to where a Mc Donald’s restaurant stood,
its warmth and lights reaching out to all in the area,
reminding anyone there of the hot and tasty food being sold within it.
But for Willie, its prices were still way too far out of his ball park to afford.

He continued to gather up the others, and I then began to realize that all these kids knew Willie very well,
and thought of him as their good friend.

Some stayed there in the city, but others were finally ready to leave it,
and they got onto the bus with Willie, that would take them out into the country,
where there was more hope for a better future. Thankfully, the bus driver allowed the homeless to ride for free,
so this cost was still affordable for them.

It was a long ride, and during this time,
I heard the whispers of others on the bus relay their stories of how Willie had helped them out.
Sometimes he would scrounge around in the dumpsters of Mc Donalds, looking for a few French fries left over in a bag,
and instead of eagerly eating them for himself, he would just take one or two to keep him going,
and then hand off the rest to them. He taught them how to avoid the cops, where the safest and warmest place was to sleep,
and who was safe and who was dangerous. One time, I was told he even went to jail for another,
knowing he would get the lesser sentence. (And knowing this would have been the death of the other man.)
No matter what your race or creed, Willie was always there to give you that helping hand.
He even helped them unite with each other to protect each other when he wasn’t there.
It seemed as if there wasn’t anything that their old Willy wouldn’t do for them.

I realized then, that not one of them would have been on that bus, had they not known Willie.

These kids were now leaving the inner city for good,
And were going to roam about the countryside and beyond,
in the hopes of finding something they could do and eat.
Most of the owners of the houses that were strewn about,
were willing to lend a helping hand if they could.
The kids were very willing to work to earn their food,
and were even eager to learn a new trade, or help out somehow,
and at least out in the countryside, there were still green places that existed.
At the worst, they figured they could pick the grass and eat it.
They weren’t all convinced that life in the country would be better,
but they figured it couldn’t be worse than what their life had been in the city,
so they followed Willie out of there, for Willie had never led them wrong before.
They knew that Willie cared for them. They trusted Willie. They loved him as one of their own.

After they had exited the bus and met up with some of the volunteers that would help them to transition to their new life,
the kids looked around for Willie, but could not find him. They cried out for him, but there was no answer.

I seen him though, hiding out at the back of the bus,
As it began its trip back to the inner city.
He kept himself well hid from their searching eyes, till they were well out of view.

The bus driver just gave Willy a conspiratorial smile. He was also well acquainted with poor Willie.

As he returned to the city, my heart ached for Willie.

For some reason, he was compelled to keep returning there; he had no peace at all within him, unless he was back there.

Why could he not have stayed with them?
I sensed that he even had a family there somewhere in the country.
I sensed this is where he went, to beg for the money to go back and make that clothing purchase.
I knew now that the purchase was not for him. I sensed it was to go to someone who really needed it, to help them get a job.
(Willie figured that the new shirt and jewelry could help disguise the man’s ‘slightly’ worn pants and shoes.)
So, if he felt he could ask them for such money, why did he feel like he couldn’t go and live there with them?

My heart just ached to see him return to such an awful place.

*

I woke up from the dream then,
And told my God that I didn’t think the dream was from Him.

“This message is just too hard to take, Lord!
And besides,” I added on to my reasoning, “Your name wasn’t even mentioned ONCE through out that whole dream!”
(This has long been a mark in my dreams, that lets me know when they are from Him.
If Jesus is being praised or prayed to in the dream, then the dream must not be from satan,
for satan can not stand to hear Jesus being praised!)

But that voice from within was still insisting.

“O.k. Lord, so tell me. How could that dream possibly be from You?! Where is the positive message within it?”

There was a pause that I thought would remain, but then He answered me.
“Even when Willie was broke, he still had much to offer Me.”

Well, o.k., I understood the message now, but it still felt too depressing for me to take.
“Lord,” I said, still shaking my head in disbelief, “I need to see something more positive than that.
I need to hear Your Name in the dream to believe that it is from You!”

“Very well then,” He told me. “Go back to sleep.”

So I did.

Only rarely did the Lord ever wake me from a dream,
and then have me pick up right where I had left off when going back to sleep.
But I sensed that this is what He was going to do.

And sure enough He did.

But this time, the dream had advanced quite a bit in the time line.

I was still looking at the same inner city, but now the landscape had subtly changed.

There were hardly any cars in the parking lot. No goods were sitting out on the sidewalks anymore.
No shoppers could be seen anywhere.

The stores were desolate. A few had even been broken into,
And their remaining pieces of merchandise now lay on the ground, broken and unusable.

I could hear the sound of faint voices coming from within one of these stores, so I went in to investigate.

There, I found old Willie, still sitting there looking ageless, trying to befriend the girl next to him.
On the other side of them, sat an older black woman, listening in to their conversation.

I could sense, that the conversation was one that had been well used,
but for some reason, was no longer working.

The girl that Willie was trying to help, was named Brianna,
after the famous singer from the year 2013. Like the singer,
the girl had once been very beautiful, but now as she turned her face to look at William,
I could see that several of her front teeth were rotted black, and some of them were even missing,
having been knocked out by a fist a few years earlier.
Both her eyes were sunken in and looked like they were still black and blue from physical abuse.

I then seen her keeper, a bouncer type, sitting farther off in the corner.
He was not poor at all. He wore jewelry around his neck and fingers,
and he was covered in fine clothes that looked to be new and well kept.
He sat there listening in also, and as he did, he had two pairs of large sized green dice,
that he kept throwing up into the air and catching again with his beefy strong hands.
Each time they landed, he would open up his hands to read the dice.

Willie kept trying to tell the girl, that she must leave with him on the bus tonight, but she wouldn’t say anything.

Brianna brought her body up to one of the huge deep fryers that was still there, and then rolled herself in the oil.
Her body was so small and frail that this was easy to do.

The woman sitting there listening in, finally spoke up at her actions.
“Brianna dear, please don’t do that honey! They are turning on the fryer right now!
You must get out or you will be burned!”

But she still sat there in the huge fryer, with her legs tucked in underneath her.

The bouncer watched, but said nothing.

Brianna then spoke up. “This is the only way I can FEEL anything! If I’m not hurting, then I don’t feel right…”

At this, the older lady began to cry. “Oh Brianna child! Don’t be doing this to yourself!
There has got to be another way!”

But Brianna remained unmoving in the fryer.

Then the voice of the older woman began to rise in volume.

She was weeping and crying out to her God.

“Oh Lordy Lordy Jesus! Can’t You just PLEASE take this child home now?
Why must You keep her living on this earth? Hasn’t she suffered enough?
Please Jesus! Have mercy on her! Take her life now! Bring her home to be with You!
Please, Please, Please Jesus! Hear me! Answer me! PLEASE!”

I looked over to William and seen that even his eyes were wet with tears.

The oil had been steadily heating up, and the smell of raw cooking flesh wafted up from the fryer.
Brianna was beginning to moan and scream from the pain.

Finally Willie and the woman could not stand it any longer,
and reached over and pulled Brianna out of the huge fryer,
and laid her very gently upon the ground.

The bouncer had gotten up from the corner immediately
when he had seen them grab a hold of Brianna and lift her out of the oil,
and Willie and the woman wondered if they would now be killed for interfering.

But the roll of the dice was with them.

The bouncer swung the dice in his hands up again, and tried to read them when they landed.

But the bouncer found he could not read them any longer, for they had just broken in his hands and were beyond repair.

He gave a slight shrug,threw the dice away, and then walked off.

Willie and the older woman took this as a sign,
And went to pick up the still crying Brianna.

She gave them no resistance,
(which they also took as a sign,
for this also had not happened before,)
and between the two of them,
they were able to place her on the bus that was waiting for them.

The bus driver still remained there in the parking lot,
Keeping an eye on Brianna,
And waited for Willie and the woman to return.
This ride was on his own dime, for the city bus system had long ago stopped serving this area.
The driver had managed to scrape enough money together (with the help of several others,)
to find an old unused bus and some gas for one more ride into town.

Willie had gone off again, calling out around the buildings,
for anyone else left there, (no matter what their age,) who wanted to take that chance and leave with them.

Willie was frantic with his cries and his searching. Much time passed, but he would not give up and get on that bus.

Finally the older woman convinced Willie to board the bus, almost pulling him in with her.

And while the bus drove out into the country one more time, I heard the voice of the woman trying to placate Willie.

“You’ve done all you can, William!,” she said to him, still pleading with him. “There is no one left there now to help!
The children have all gone! It’s over William! You’re done! Now it is your turn to go into the country!”

She kept on repeating this to Willie,
Still trying to convince him.

When Brianna would begin to moan again from the pain, the older woman would go to her and hold her gently,
rocking her back and forth and letting her cry in her arms.

As she held her, the old woman began to pray for Jesus to take her home again.

Finally the bus arrived, and a huge group of people were there to greet them.

The bus driver and the old woman carried out Brianna, and she was placed into waiting arms.
They left the group to go attend to her burns.

As I watched her leave, I couldn’t help but wonder if Brianna would ever truly heal from her emotional wounds.
Would she ever realize that even now she was still a valued child of God?

Then Willie got off the bus.

He stumbled out of the bus a few steps, and then just stood there, as the throng of people slowly enclosed around him.

They were the people he had helped through out the years to escape the inner city.

Most had been able to learn how to grow enough food for them to survive on.
Other trades had also been learned. A whole community sprang up in the area,
made up of these once-children refugees.

Not all had remained there; some had moved further up into the mountains.
But many had returned to be there for Willie, for what they were told, could be his last run.

“Hey Willie!” All the smiling voices welcomed him eagerly. “Good to see ya man!
You did it Willie! You saved us all! “Good job, Willie! We love you man!”

Many hugged him and kissed his cheek, and others patted him on the back over and over again.

It was clear to me, that all who were there, loved him deeply.

I watched as something must have finally happened within the heart of Willie,
for he now sank to his knees, looked up into the heavens, and gave thanks to God out loud.
Now he was at peace.
No longer would he board that bus and try to rescue those children.
He himself, finally acknowledged, that his job was indeed now done.

He returned to his parents home, and was reunited finally with the whole family.
He lived out the rest of his life there, amongst those he had helped, knowing he had completed his biggest work for God.
Even those around him knew, that one day Willie would go to heaven, and Jesus himself would greet him,
by saying “well done, my good and faithful servant.”

*

I then woke up and began to cry, ashamed that I had wanted Willie to stop before his work was done.
I was so busy thinking of Willie’s comfort, and seeing the dream through my own eyes,
that I didn’t realize what it would look like in the end through God’s eyes.
The thought of God’s tapestry came to mind, and I cried harder.

*

To all the Willies out there in this world,
PLEASE! DO NOT GIVE UP TOO SOON!
Others whom you know not of
will be with you in prayer.
Keep going, till the last one is saved!

For indeed your reward in heaven WILL be great…

*

“Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor,
and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me.” (Matthew 19:21)

“Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life,
which God has promised to those who love him.”
(James 1:12, ESV)

“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things;
I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’ (Matthew 25:21 NIV)

“Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father,
inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was hungry,
and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.” (Matthew 25:34-36)

“For ye had compassion of me in my bonds, and took joyfully the spoiling of your goods,
knowing in yourselves that ye have in heaven a better and an enduring substance.
Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompense of reward.
For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.” (Hebrews 10:34-36)

“And, behold, I come quickly; and my reward is with me, to give every man according as his work shall be.” (Revelation 22:12)

And as far as Brianna’s outcome, the Lord gave me Matthew 19:26:

“And Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” – 1599 Geneva Bible (GNV)